Hi all, I just need somewhere to vent I think but any encouraging words or advice is welcome. My partner and I have been together for over 5 years, we have a 3 year old daughter. Today I found out that she is pregnant with another mans baby one month before our wedding day. The real kicker is that this morning I purchase the ring I was going to wear on our day.

My fiancé had been acting a little weird over the last month and I began to grow suspicious. I caught her snapchatting some guy and when I asked who it was she quickly turned her phone around and said "nobody". I had my alarm bells going off instantly, we were pretty open normally so this instantly stood out as very suspicious. I press further and she claims its just some other single dad, I've known him my whole life etc etc, just a friend. I told her she was acting really suspicious and I think something is up. She assures me there isn't but I keep my eyes peeled anyways and tell her that that kind of behavior is not ok in a relationship and you've lost alot of trust. Another month goes by and she has been either love bombing me with amazing sex and affection or just being plain rude, demanding and insulting towards me. Its been an absolute rollercoaster.

So, how did I find out? I had the day off work today to get my car serviced and get some general admin done that had been piling up. I then made my way back to my partners work to grab her car for the day. This sneaking suspicion had been nagging me the whole month and I decided to snoop on her laptop once I had got home which is always logged into Facebook. What I found still has my head spinning. She sent photos to her friend of her positive pregnancy test, she then sent audio messages revealing everything, that she's freaking out, that she wants the guy to pay for an abortion, that she has some upcoming blood tests today, that she's hoping her period comes because she's missed it. She also mentions that she doesn't want the other guy to come to these appointments because there is still some feelings between the two. She also sent a screenshot of her messages to the guy which stated "Fathers day is coming up and I guess you should know there is another one on the way". I spent the rest of the day pacing the house wrapping my head around what I had just seen. I have taken photos of everything and have them stored away securely.

Later that day I pick her up from work and she asks me to drive her to her appointment. I ask her what its for and if she wants me to come in, she says no its just a gal bladder thing, go get a coffee etc etc. I know full well that she is having bloods taken for a pregnancy test, but I play along, I figure its best not to confront her until we are home and there is no more driving to be done. Once she's finished we drive home and she is saying how amazing of a partner I am, how supportive I am and how she feels so safe and loved with me. She even says "I know you are having your car service, how about you service me?" I decline.

We get home and I ask her to sit down because we need to talk. I surprised myself with how calm but concise and direct I was. I didn't yell or explode or anything, I just said "I know everything, I know what the appointment was about, I know you cheated a month before our wedding, I know that you're pregnant, the wedding is cancelled and this relationship is over. I don't hate you, you are not my worst enemy but you are still the mother of my kid, we still have to work together for our daughter. That being said there is no saving this relationship. As a side note, I purchased my wedding ring today, I couldn't wait to tell you all about it." Her mouth gaped open and all she said was "oh.."

I asked some follow up questions like when was it? how many times? is there anyone else? One dude, one time, about a month ago, and yeah it was the snapchat guy. She begins bawling and apologizing and saying I don't deserve this, that she has ruined her life. She tries to explain it all away and give excuses but I don't feel any emotions, normally I'm a pretty chipper guy, and seriously any other day news like this should have shattered me but I just stay quiet and let her get it all out. She talks for 2 hours, and all I'm doing is confirming that "yes this relationship is over." I'm stoic and calm the whole time, I do not know how I managed this, I think I'm just numb and disappointed more than anything.

I offer her to stay for a month or so to get everything sorted on her exit, I can keep paying bills etc and I'm not throwing her to the curb. We can take each day as it comes slowly, but we are always taking steps to moving you out. She is incredibly thankful and apologetic but none of that really matters, she's stuffed up and its time to move on. She's staying at her friends house tonight and I'm not sure what tomorrow brings. I'm currently home with my daughter asleep completely clueless to any of this. Any advice on this guys? Where did the monk like calmness come from? am I due to explode soon? Where should I put my efforts in the next few days? How can I healthily move through this? So many questions swirling around at this point. Thanks all for reading.