I know that what I’m doing is terrible. I swear I’m not typing this to get any sort of approval, I’m doing it to get it off of my chest.

My wife and I are 19. We’ve been together for 3 years and got married 5 months ago. The relationship was genuine even though we were young.

We dealt with a lot of adversities (mainly being her abusive father disliking me) and pushed through each one. Even though it won’t seem like it, I really do love her.

Her mother (who’s 40) and I have always had a great relationship. I admired her deeply because she went through a lot of painful,

horrifying disgusting things in her life yet was still the sweetest, most optimistic individual I’ve ever met.

A literal angel. Even though she was the mother, my wife was extremely protective of her because she had such an innocence.

She moved in with my wife and I about 3 months ago. We have a tiny one bedroom apartment so she’s had to sleep on our super uncomfortable couch, which she does happily. After she moved in, our relationship started slowly started changing. We would have to keep each other company because my wife works long hours. In turned out that we were into a lot of the same things like anime, certain books and certain series. Things my wife doesn’t care for. So we bonded over those things at first. Then she started opening up more about her life and I became even more admired and protective over her. I just wanted her to be happy and loved for once.

Soon, I started noticing her physically. She’s a thicker woman, which I always secretly had a thing for even though my wife is very petite and thin. It seemed like she would start wearing a little less, pajama shorts instead of pajama pants for example. And her thick legs always looked extremely soft and smooth. She used to always wear socks but then she started going barefoot and I found her feet (kinda chubby) really cute. Little things would turn me on to the point where I would masturbate to her.

A week ago, she came back to our place crying. I immediately went to comfort her and I held her on the couch. I kept asking her what was wrong and she refused to tell me out of embarrassment. I kept telling her it was ok to tell me and she broke down and admitted that she feels extremely fat, old and undesirable. Said that she saw a a group of guys laughing at her. I honestly started crying too and tried my best to convince her that she was not any of those things and then something just came over me. I started kissing her. I thought she would push me away and slap me but instead she started kissing me back. It got extremely heated and long story short, we had sex. Well made love would be more fitting.

Afterwards she broke down and decided to get a hotel to stay in instead of with us. I understood. But ever since, when my wife goes to work, I drive to her room and we have sex. I’ve begun craving her to an uncomfortable level, every tiny thing a lot her. Even her flaws are delicious to me. She seems to really want me too and is honestly way more passionate than my wife has ever been.

I know that this has to end and very very soon. I fell down a terrible black hole and it’s all my fault. Now that I’m stuck in it, I don’t even know how to begin to stop.